Saturday, August 23, 2008

Cleaning house



One day last week I caught myself polishing a silver serving stand after I dropped the kids off at camp, rather than returning to my office upstairs. 
I was avoiding my more-than-a-page-long to-do list.

It seemed impossible to cross anything off of it completely, but if I subdivided the tasks, the list would expand to who knows how many pages. (And yes, I still keep a list on paper, in a notebook, the back page of which includes all my passwords and other private data that if I worked in a normal office would completely violate workplace security regulations.)

There was no real reason to polish the silver stand; it wasn’t like I was prepping for a dinner party. Normally it sits on the corner of the counter with fruit in it. But I had left some peaches in it too long the week before and they’d practically fermented, leaving behind a sticky mess, which just shone a light on the fact that the piece was really tarnished. (And no, you can’t remove tarnish from silver with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser sponge, but you can almost remove Sharpie marker from white cabinets or the dining room table).

I poked around under the kitchen sink and found the silver polish, which has probably been in our family for years, even decades. I don’t own all that much silver and I couldn’t even remember the last time I used it. I probably inherited it from my mom.

I spent maybe ten minutes methodically cleaning the piece and let my mind wander. I don’t remember what I thought about, but it wasn’t my to-do list.

I found myself doing similar mindless tasks during the past week that had nothing to do with work. A few times, I asked myself why I was “wasting” time doing this when I had so many other pressing things to do.

What I realized is I just needed a mental break, to feel like I was in control of something, to feel a sense of accomplishment. Getting back to work and staying focused became easier after I’d “cleaned house.”


My brown dog, the end.

 (If you want to read the beginning first, it’s here .) I woke up in dread on the day my dog, Niles, crossed the rainbow bridge. I had gone ...